Hey guys, been a while. I missed it here. Give a little thanks to Mrs. Corona for making this possible, if it weren't for her I wouldn't have the time that I do now. So, let's chat, little life update. Do ya'll mind if I'm transparent and a little dramatic on here? I hate that I can't go outside, I hate that school is canceled and because of that I can no longer see my friends (speaking of, to who this applies hows online classes going? Feel free to comment thoughts and experiences.), and I hate that I'm trapped in the hometown that houses tragedies of my past (okay here I'm being dramatic because frankly, life here wasn't that bad it's that I live in a real-life Radiator Springs). The first few days of finding out that I would not be returning to school due to the severity of the CoronaVirus I was devastated. I felt like I had no real power in this situation. Like I'd had all my friends, plans, and freedom stripped from me. But I'm stubborn, no, determined. I hate the thought of something or someone making me feel like there's no hope left because there always is even if it's only a sliver. The worst part of this all is we don't have an exact timeline of when this will be over, so why not take advantage of it?
I was listening to a song on Gambino's latest release 53.49 yesterday night and there were several lines in it that resonated with me especially around this time. Several revelations were made clear. That was most definitely a very unnecessary sentence but I was itching to use the word revelation because it sounds so cool, doesn't it? Anyways-
So I was listening, jamming and I heard the first line, cried a little, played it back a few times, and cried some more. But not because I was sad. It made me feel so hopeful, so happy. "There is love in every moment, under the sun..." This line stood out to me as a reminder that during this confusing time we are all experiencing this, together, under the same sun. It's so interesting to see people come together over shared tragedies like this one. Sometimes I wish I lived in an apartment so I could go out on my balcony and start an acapella group with my neighbors like they're doing in Italy but I'll allow that vision to live in my dreams for now. All jokes aside, the compassion for others that is being shown by people who are deciding to self-quarantine themselves and limit their traveling is incredible and I love to see it.
There's a part of the song where Glover kinda semi-sings, semi-screams this line," when you feel alone, know you're not alone" and it set so well in my soul. At that moment I felt like he was talking directly to me saying "look around, look at all the people you have right with you in this that care about you." During this pandemic, it's been a stressful and straining time for many people to adjust to. Most of us are seemingly stuck within the same four walls of our houses or rooms. These circumstances have emphasized the importance of family and friends; unity altogether. There have been days where I've gotten really in my head about everything going on but having people there alongside you makes everything easier, even if it's just us being sad together. That's a joke, kind of! But no really, we are each other's support system and we should always be each other's support system even in times it's not as detrimental because you never know the effect it may have on someone. I know it always means a lot to me. Honestly, if it wasn't for this woman, she's a whole woman, Niya (here's her blog link she's so cool & is always so positive and encouraging: niyaahmed22.wixsite.com/website/home/) I probably would not have written for a while because of how discouraged Mrs. Corona had me. So yeah, shoutout your loved ones, admirers, and inspirers.
"When you looking at the devil but you lookin' in the mirror, what you gon' say?" Hearing this line was kind of a reality check for me. I was sitting on my bed stunned like woah, he said 'how you fighting your demons when you are the demon??' Crazy. Before this whole virus thing I so unfocused and because of that I wasn't giving anything I did my full attention or energy. I was well aware of that but because so many different things had my attention I didn't really need to acknowledge it. Because of self-quarantine I've had no choice but to face the music, self reflect, adjust, and advance and I must say it was much needed. So look in the mirror, ask yourself, are you happy with yourself and are you doing what you need/want to be doing to the best of your abilities?
In conclusion, even in an ordeal like this one, we are given the power, the power to respond and react in such a way that our resilience as an individual and as a people is shown. Mrs. Corona may have put us in time out so let's think about what we've done and come out new and improved.